It’s been awhile since I’ve written a blog. I barely write status updates too lately. I have to say I kinda miss writing and sharing my unspoken thoughts. But the thing is, I made a vow to limit posting negative thoughts and emotions until today.
I wanted to cry and ask all of you to pray for me. I dunno where my pain is coming from or why am i so sensitive lately. Is it because I’m insecure, no.I know I’m worth it and You have a great plan for me. Is it because i am drowning in my workload and I dunno where to get money to pay whatever they claim we need to pay. Is it because i feel there’s injustice and the results of the recent elections all the more confirmed it. We need a miracle with the kind of leaders we have elected to office for the next 6 years. Again we prove that while more people became responsible and educated voters, the majority still listens to name recall. Hence we have a Pnoy right?
But no, honestly i just wanna let you know i wanna feel you again. Yes, I am to blame.I don’t get to talk to you often. I choose to give in to my selfish desires. My desire to run away and live a life outside my home country. My desire to say yes to service. My desire to find that one true love. My desire to be seen as Captivating. A rare find. A gem worth leaving everything else behind. A princess worth any battle..A love worth fighting for.
Yes that’s the truth. I have deliberately forgotten Your promise. Your assurance through my angels here on earth. That GREATER things are coming and that my miracles are coming!
Lord sorry, but You know it’s so hard to smile when things around you starts to crumble. When all my efforts are not enough. But I guess I can’t hide anything from you. No matter how inadequate or useless I feel, You never fail to remind me how great your love is for me. How bright the future you have prepared for me.
Lord this is me crying for help. This is me saying I so need your hug and assurance. This is me declaring I trust you out loud! I dare to dream again and go back to the battlefield of life, ready to get hurt and ready to be victorious.
Let’s do this Lord, please continue to hold my hand. Thank you for saying, Welcome Home My beautiful princess. Come share your father’s joy. Amen!